day 2/100: getting started

Like I expected, today was another day for prepping rather than actually jumping into the routines. But I still got a lot done! I actually went grocery shopping solo- which might sound silly, but usually I only shop with my husband, mostly because it’s more fun. But I think having an unreliable car really affected my ability to function, I’ve gotten in a really bad habit over never going anywhere without either borrowing my husband’s car or going with him. Today’s shopping was really successful though!

Today is cycle day 19, 6dpo, which means this starts the implantation window. I love and hate this stage so so much- every cycle I get my hopes up and think too much about every symptom and start picturing the timeline- when I’ll test, when I can tell people, when I’ll hit milestones, when I’ll be due. Inevitably I’ve been disappointed. At this point it’s hard to even envision what that’ll be like. Maybe cycle 42 will be different. Maybe it’ll be the same.

I didn’t do well with the eating and sleeping and exercising, but my goal for tomorrow is to start with the routine. I’m trying not to beat myself up or convince myself to restart everything- it’ll be okay! it’ll be fine! I’m not in trouble!

Beauty and Style: work on brows

My eyebrows have always been a huge annoyance. Most of the time I just let them do whatever and hope my glasses hide them, but I think I would feel better if they were better groomed. Eventually I’ll get up the nerve to have someone else wax them, but for today I slapped on some facial Nair and tweezed the strays. I think it made a difference?

Creativity and Self Care: research plants

I really want to have some flowers by my front door, but I live in a hot humid swamp, and in an apartment, plus I don’t really know much about plants. I don’t really want anything tropical either, but my desire for wildflowers probably won’t work out. After researching…maybe marigolds or gardenias?

Connection: catch up on AO3 comments

Confession time: I’m a huge lover of writing fanfiction. It’s fun, it’s creatively fulfilling without the pressure of original writing, and it’s a great way for me to make friends and connect with people. I’m just super behind on comments! I tried to knock out about 20-25 responses, but I still have a long ways to go.

Cleaning: catch up on laundry

We’ve gotten way behind on laundry, and when I say we I mean me. Shane and I believe in dividing our chores, and I’m usually on top of the laundry. It’s just gotten away from me. It doesn’t help that our sweet kitty is elderly (he just turned fifteen this week!) and he’s been having trouble with peeing, which means we tend to just toss in the stuff that…really needs to be washed. But today I did about five loads, and put them away! (Can we be real here- putting the laundry away is the worst step.)

Journaling: what emotions am I feeling today about TTC?

That wraps up day 2! Tomorrow I’m absolutely determined to get up early and stick to my routine. I don’t know if it’ll happen or if I’ll be too tired (I’m already behind on my self imposed bedtime), but I’m going to do my best.

day 1/100 (cycle #40, day 3)

Today was the first official day for my 100 to Baby Challenge. I fully chickened out of making Tiktoks, though. I intended on making a Tiktok and and even took a few clips, and then it just…fizzled out. Maybe I’m not ready for that step. I might try again later!

The routine went well in the morning- I went for a walk, I ate breakfast, I left for work on time. I didn’t put on any makeup, but that’s okay.

Evening? Not quite as good. I had a whole plan for the afternoon, especially since I got home earlier than usual, but all my plans go thrown out the window. Not only was my husband home (a good thing, but he’s the most chaotic human and I didn’t plan to work around him), but he had A) disassembled our old broken bed frame and thrown it out, B) had all the pieces of the new bed frame scattered across the apartment, and C) had started making a different dinner from the one we’d agreed on the night before. My whole neurodivergent brain went WOOP.

We got it all figured out, but I didn’t end up doing my second workout or cleaning, and I definitely didn’t stick to my healthy eating (the food itself wasn’t unhealthy, but I did eat more than I planned). But I did get back on track with my nighttime skincare routine, and here I am blogging! Tomorrow I close at work, so things will be unpredictable again, but I have a night shift routine planned out and I’m hoping for the best.

Health
-didn’t sleep 7 hours, but did get an 86 sleep score
-ate decently today- I’d give myself a 7/10
-went for a morning walk but didn’t do afternoon workout
-vitamins taken!

Beauty and Style: Work on brows
My brows tend to go crazy. I feel like I have no idea what to do with them. I at least tried to tame them, which is more than I’ve done in months!

Creativity and Self Care: build a playlist for the year
I made myself a quick Spotify playlist with some of my favorite “keep going” songs. My motto for this year is “do it sad,” so I picked a lot of high energy hopeful songs- “Don’t Lose Sight” by Lawrence, “Dog Days are Over” by Florence and the Machine, “Opalite” by Taylor Swift. Things like that.

Connection: make 2026 goals with Shane
This ended up being a really sweet little conversation. He wants us to go to more baseball games together, go out to eat at more restaurants instead of picking up food and bringing it home when we treat ourselves, and going on walks together. I love all those plans. I was just going to say that my goal was for us to have a baby, but I love all of these ideas that he had.

**Journaling Prompt: What are my fears around fertility, and where do they come from?